Stop Texting First: 6 Critical Reasons to Wait

woman who decided to stop texting him first

Relationships should be two-way streets. There needs to be reciprocity between you and your partner. There’s nothing more painful than unrequited love. If you happen to feel you’re trying harder than they are, it may be time to stop texting first.

This can let them know how it feels for the shoe to be on the other foot.

In this article, we’re going to cover some of the best reasons you should let them send the first text message.

1. Find out who your friends are

If you find that you are always the one doing the reaching out, that might say something about the stability of your relationships.

Why is the onus always on you to initiate contact, or to make plans to get together?

By giving your friends or significant other the opportunity to be the first to respond, you will get to see which of them actually want to make an effort to be in your life. Just be sure to respond promptly when they do.

The very best friends will understand how you feel without being told explicitly.

2. Let them miss you

In addition to seeing who wants to be a part of your inner circle, not always being the one to text first allows people the chance to miss you. This is hard to do if they see messages from you every time they pick up their phone.

It is a much nicer feeling to receive a message from someone who actively thought of you, versus a simple reply to something you sent first.

You may find it is better to let them start thinking about you on their own rather than forcing them to change their behavior with an ultimatum.

3. Smacks of desperation

It can come across as needy and desperate if you’re constantly messaging your SO about upcoming events or daily thoughts. Even if your intentions are good, it can wear them thin. This is especially true if you’re sending multiple messages before they can even respond back.

Stop texting first in order to give them a little space. This will give others the impression that you are not thirsty for their friendship. People are drawn to those who possess confidence. Sending a million unsolicited messages daily does not suggest this is one of your qualities.

4. Closeness creates distance

It’s great to be excited about relationships, but it is important to make sure that your messaging enthusiasm is at the same level as your partner’s or there could be trouble. What you may perceive as cute and flirty may be interpreted as scary and stalker-like.

If your messages are not being received and returned with the passion you are hoping for, it is probably time to slow your messaging. You may be trying to bring someone closer, but they are likely trying to push you away.

5. You deserve better

It’s one thing to always be the first to reach out, but it’s another to have to carry an entire relationship. If someone that you are messaging is not returning your messages at all, or is expecting you to always be the one to make the plans and cover the costs, it is time to get out.

This behaviour is rude and abusive. Stop messaging immediately.

Recognize that someone who takes advantage of you is dangerous to continue carrying on any form of relationship with.

6. Stop texting first to get to know yourself

You may, in fact, find that once you stop stressing over little things like messaging that you begin to build up confidence in yourself.

It will feel good to have people reach out to you for once. You will feel appreciated.

Gaining this insight may help you see all of the good qualities you possess and understand what it is your friends see in you.

Concluding Thoughts on Why You Should Stop Texting First

Sending the message that opens a conversation shows you want to interact with your partner. It’s a form of love.

If they’re always waiting you out, then they’re playing a game that you shouldn’t allow yourself to be a part of. You deserve better than to always feel like you’re playing second fiddle.

With that said, if you’re messaging too much, it can actually prevent them from being first. If you’re constantly texting, you’re not giving them room to reach out to you in the first place.

Take control back over your own emotions by pumping the brakes on your messaging habits.